Posted by mmorand on August 7, 2009
Hello All!
It’s been a very busy time here at CEDRIC and in my own life. Thankfully both pieces seem to be settling down and August looks to be a time of catching up, relaxing and settling in. Here, here!
I’m very much enjoying my patio, with its all day sunshine and watching my young son bouncing merrily on his trampoline.
I was sifting through a journal from this time last year and recognized that many of the goals I had for my life last year have been realized and that the others are well on their way to manifesting. It occurred to me in that moment how incredibly lucky that makes me, and then it occurred to me that it wasn’t luck at all. It was the practice of first trusting that I was deserving of and could create the life of my dreams; then came the piece of conceptualizing that dream existence; then came the process of identifying the steps I needed to take to get from point A to point B.
Trust in the big picture
All along the theme is trust. Trusting my deservedness, trusting my capabilities, trusting the key people in my life, trusting that, regardless of how things seem in the moment, they always, always, work out for the best. I don’t know whether you’re a spiritual person, a religious person or neither. The good news is it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to believe in a higher power or God or anything greater than yourself (although you certainly can) in order to be able to look back at your life so far and see that the events and circumstances you felt maybe “shouldn’t” have been happening then led you to the place you are now.
Out of adversity comes strength. That has been shown to me time and time again. The greatest gift of my personal growth this past decade has been the development of a profound sense of trust that regardless of how things appear in any given moment, they are unfolding exactly as they should. And if I look for the gains, the positives in each situation, I will find them, just as surely as I will find the downside if I seek it.
It is our choice, as beings with free will, to focus on what is working or on what isn’t; to attach to how we think things should be or to let go and be open to the silver lining in every situation. It is so easy to get hooked on how things should look and then get angry, sad, hurt, frustrated, scared, etc. when things don’t go as planned. It is far, far easier and far more strengthening to recognize when you’re holding on to things looking a certain way and to just let go and trust that something even better than you had imagined is coming your way.
Again, you don’t have to look very far to see the truth of this. Most of us can recall a circumstance – say, the loss of a job or a relationship that we wouldn’t have chosen at the time and that we truly felt shouldn’t be happening or was just downright “wrong.” In hindsight though, wouldn’t you say that “it” worked out for the best; that the loss of that connection or career opened new avenues that led to people and places you wouldn’t now trade for the world?
It’s a challenge in the moment to let go and trust in the bigger picture. In fact, it would be truthful to say it is “the” challenge of our lives. And the more we learn to recognize when we’re holding on and to instead, allow ourselves to just let go and trust, the easier, more peaceful, more fun, more amazing and beautiful life gets.
I challenge you to recognize some of the things in your present life that you’re resisting letting go of or resisting accepting and see what happens if you just challenge yourself to say, “Well, this is what’s happening. It may scare me. It may not be what I expected or wanted. But I know things always unfold in a way that leads me to bigger and better things. Can I just relax and open myself to this experience as best I can?”
If you can repeat this mantra when you catch yourself resisting change, you will find a sense of strength and peace, even in the face of a greatest challenge, that carries you through. We are human, we have feelings. That’s healthy and normal. It’s what we do with those feelings that makes the difference. Do we stuff them and tell ourselves we shouldn’t have them or that what’s happening in our lives shouldn’t be happening? Or do we recognize them for the indicators they are and look beneath them for the situation or story that is triggering them? The first scenario leads to the use of food to cope. The second scenario leads to freedom.
If you’d like to be able to choose the second scenario over the first and to develop a deep sense of trust in your ability to navigate life with dignity and grace, rather than with food and body image focus, I welcome the opportunity to work with you and support you to achieve that goal.
It is possible.
Whether you prefer one-on-one counselling (in-person, by phone, or email), our intensive and transformative workshops, or the self-help approach, take action today to have a stress-free relationship with food. Life is far too short to waste one more day.
Love Michelle
Tags: acceptance, body/mind/spirit, core beliefs, drill sergeant, eating disorders, exploring, forgiveness, future, grounding, growing, healing, nurturing, past, present, promises, recovery, self care, self esteem, self love, tandem healing, workshops
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, Relationship with Others, Relationship with Self
A few weeks ago, during our self-care series, I received this email asking for some specific support around goal setting and changing harmful patterns.
“Thank you for this article, it sounds so easy when you break the goal down into small pieces that are seemingly easily attainable.
I’m really struggling with a lack of sociability. I put off going out and meeting people (even going to the market) and am getting more and more housebound. I find myself dreading any social contact and I just want to pull the covers over my head and stay in bed. Can you help me with my goal of being a little more outgoing and getting myself to socialize without throwing myself into a state of panic? Thanks for all your great articles and help.”
For those of you out there also struggling with the coping strategies of isolation, avoidance and procrastination, let me offer you a suggestion for moving past and into an experience of life that is fuller and richer than the one you’re living right now.
(more…)
Hey out there! I was just getting ready for my day and my mind was reflecting on a few recent events in my life and noticing a commonality between them. So naturally I thought I’d share these reflections with you.
It seems that the overall lesson is that when life presents us with an opportunity to change a harmful pattern, we have two choices (assuming we’re conscious enough of the pattern to see it in the first place):
1. We can see the opportunity to do things differently and choose to do things the same old way anyway. Usually we make this choice out of fear of change or fear of angering or disappointing someone if we were to behave differently than they “expect.”
Or…..
Hello! How was your week?
This is the final installment in our 6-part series on self-care. If you haven’t read the others, here are the links:
Hello All! I hope you had a positive and forward-moving week.
This is week two in our series on Self-Care. If you haven’t read last week’s post, click here to access 
Okay folks, we’re going to take a little journey together (if you’re willing). It is a journey to a place called “balance.” And we get there by walking a path called “self-care.” Say goodbye to your old patterns of behaviour. Say goodbye to harmful old relationships, places of work, and miscellaneous other people, places and things that undermine you and your sense of peace and happiness. Once you start down Self-Care Lane you won’t be needing or wanting to return. I guarantee you!
For the next month, we’re going to be putting one foot, gently but firmly, in front of the other to create a life that is balanced, peaceful, and honoring who you really are and what you truly deserve in life.
Our journey begins with you taking a few minutes to get clear on where you are now. Then we’ll take a look at where you’d like to be and fill in the spaces between step-by-step so you’ve got a clear path that leads you towards lasting change at a pace that is right for you.