Posts Tagged self esteem
Thoughts on Natural Eating
Many people hear the term Natural Eating and immediately assume it’s about eating whole grains and non-processed foods or has something to do with organics or locally grown produce, etc. Well, those are all great ideas and your body will love you for eating as unprocessed as possible, but….that’s not what we mean when we say “natural eating.” Natural Eating, also more recently dubbed “Intuitive Eating,” refers to the simple process of eating when you’re hungry and stopping when you’re full. As a natural eater you are conscious of your body’s signals of hunger, fullness, lightness, energy, or bloating, lethargy, fatigue and heaviness. These are your cues about what your body likes and needs vs. what it doesn’t. In a natural eating approach, you honor those cues and are drawn to choose foods that allow you to feel light, full, and energized after eating rather than heavy, bloated, and pooped out. (more…)One of the Things I Know for Sure about Body Image
One of the things I know for sure about body image, from my own recovery experience and from hundreds of conversations with clients, is that your negative self-talk and feelings of loathing, disgust and heaviness in your body can change to peaceful acceptance in 24 hours, even when nothing has physically changed in your body.
Yuppers, that’s what I said, your Drill Sgt. can be happily on vacation in Mexico in 24 hours, leaving you at home to peacefully and contentedly practice life-enhancing coping strategies and self-care. And I’m not talking about trying to talk yourself into loving yourself as you are or about settling for being the weight and shape that you are now.
So, what am I talking about? I’m talking about integrity. Integrity means that your words and actions are in alignment. You want to know the secret to happiness? It’s integrity. You want to know the secret to feeling peaceful and content in your body; in your relationships; in your career; etc?
It’s integrity: Words and Actions Aligning.
You do what you say you will. And not just to others, but first and foremost to yourself. That’s where most of us who feel controlled by food and loathing of our bodies stumble; integrity with ourselves. We’re all over taking care of others and honoring our commitments outwardly at all costs. (more…)
Body Image – summer’s coming!
by Michelle Morand
Hello out there in the CEDRIC community! Has spring sprung fully where you live? It definitely has here. There’s a quality of warmth to the air that is unique to this time of year; Something with an aftertaste of cool but not at all chilling, that allows me to relax and trust that the warm weather is finally here and that thus, I can begin the glorious task of setting aside the winter boots, coats, sweaters and warmer wear and explore the lighter shirts, pants, dresses, even…..dare I say it… shorts and tank tops.
Yes, I used to hate this time of year. I dreaded it, feared it, prayed to god that it wouldn’t come – some asteroid impacting the earth and leading to a short term ice age would have suited me just fine at that time in my life. Anything to stay bundled up and covered up from the myriad prying eyes that I believed were constantly assessing my frame for it’s acceptability and finding me excruciatingly lacking every time.
For me, this time of year represents rebirth… freedom… and expansion. I get excited at the thought of wearing less and of days at the beach with my son. The ability to engage with life without first having to wade through the heavy shroud of body image insecurities and food crap every moment of every day makes me feel like I’m living in heaven. I know I’m not the only one who experiences heaven on earth with the release of the use of food to cope. (more…)
If you do what you’ve always done… ~ Another stellar tool in my proverbial belt
Drill sergeant, voice of my long gone mother, internal dialogue that diminishes and lies to me, you better be shaking in your boots, because I have discovered one more tangible thing to do to overcome you.
I have, here on my safety tool belt that I have festooned with colourful stickers of flowers of every kind, so it matches my laptop and cell phone, along with my other tools (eat nuts instead of junk, read the label to avoid eating x, y, z; track daughter’s menstrual cycles simultaneously, how to ‘ground’, what to put in homemade fresh juices and why, etc.), another tool that I picked up in my day to day media scrounges.
I’m a very curious animal and am constantly rooting through the internet and available tv media on all 400+ channels and now that I am processing all this intense evolutionary stuff through my experience working with CEDRIC philosophy, I am learning much more about myself than I ever knew possible. (more…)Climbing the pyramid gently; how Maslow’s model can help
Abraham Maslow was a psychologist who is responsible for the pyramid entitled ‘The Heirarchy of Basic Human Needs’ which is a model he designed in order to provide insights as to where people find themselves in their personal evolution. He found that most people live out their lives content with merely subsisting, living from day to day, stuck in old ways that were counterproductive to their well being or potential.
CEDRIC utilizes this model that is found on page 63 of CEDRIC founder, Michelle Morand’s ground breaking book, ‘Food is not the problem’ to help readers see where they are, and as a result, to help figure out a way to evolve past subsistence into a life that is not bounded by incapacity, but open to it’s full potential. In Chapter 5 of FINTP, Michelle helps decipher the pyramid and teaches readers how to use it by finding oneself somewhere in the layers. (more…)The ‘Authentic Self’ Awareness Test : As the crowd in my head is tested~ Tina’s Journey’
As the garden takes shape on my balcony and I delve deeper into sustainable techniques for providing my little family food that grows fresh from my planters as well as my garden, I have also been spending a lot of time thinking about my process as I read the CEDRIC book’ you’re probably familiar with by now, ‘Food is not the problem- Deal with what is‘.
It is an interesting position that I find myself in with my job at CEDRIC as well as my process utilizing the different books, cd’s and philosophy that are now available to me. I find my life has become a rapidly evolving series of events and ponderances that result in it becoming richer, deeper and ultimately, happier.
I have to give credit where its due as its the humble and kind Michelle Morand’s teaching and energy that are contributing to the vast improvements in how I see myself. I am finally at a critical stage of recognizable achievement in this process as it is not because I am recieving external validation, but because of the diametric opposite of that, I find myself no longer requiring external validation of any sort in order to feel ‘right’ or ‘acceptable’. (more…)Tina’s Journey – Epiphany at the Blue Bridge
This weekend was a lovely combination of solitude and company as my hubby and I went through our various routines. His involvement with the Anglican church means that I am able to have a fair bit of alone time, and we spent the rest of the time puttering or having a couple of nice drives and meals out.
He shows me he loves me in many ways, but this past week, he managed to drive a major point home.
I was bemoaning that I couldn’t find clothes to fit my 6 foot, 200 mumblemumble lb. frame and that what I did find was available in one store only and everybody else that was dealing with weight issues had the same clothes. We were in traffic in the car and I can remember that we were sitting in the left turn lane to the Blue Bridge when he turned to me and said ‘I love what’s in your head, I love your heart and I love you. I don’t see girth, I see beauty. Would you just appreciate the fact that you have what the majority of the population strives for and quit being so down on yourself?’
That was truly an ‘AHA’ moment for me.
What did he mean?
(more…)The Next Phase of Healing: Allowing myself to be nurtured
There is a popular saying that claims that the squeaking wheel gets the grease. The role of the Drill Sergeant is a huge squeaking wheel in CEDRIC philosophy, and it’s true that since this is the part of the problem that is the most vocal and apparent, it is what garners all the attention. I have come to view the role of the Drill Sergeant as the canary in the coal mine, in that if I have an inner voice that belabours and berates me, it is a sign that all is not right, and that there is a inadequacy of my self-esteem, which should be balanced enough to keep the negative internalizing at bay.
If most are like me, they’ve misunderstood and compounded the harm of this enormous squeak of this wheel by giving it credence for years, without really recognizing its value. Years of trying not to hear the harsh, hateful criticisms that blindsided me made me exceptionally good at one thing. Denial. I could block it out like I blocked out the immature noises my son made as a child, but was I doing myself any favours in this solution? In hindsight, I see that the answer to that is ‘hardly’.
In Gavin de Becker’s book ‘The Gift of Fear‘, he speaks of how our responses to threats are hardwired in us to protect us. He gives an example by showing how we listen to the protective instincts within ourselves when we get behind the wheel of an automobile. We look around us and subconsciously take in signals from others that indicate to us wether the car beside us is going to switch lanes or the vehicle ahead of us is about to turn right or left, but Becker says, the minute we get out of that car and shut the doors behind us, we turn off that instinctive personal radar and cease to listen to its warnings.
This phenomena of recognizing our protective reflexes in one situation yet negating them in others is very interesting to me. When I’m driving, I don’t hear the Drill Sergeant at all. I simply do what I have to do with him kept busy keeping the car where it should be, I guess. Maybe that’s why I enjoyed driving so much, it gave me a break from the relentless diatribe.
In Michelle Morand’s book, ‘Food is not the problem – Deal with what is‘, Michelle says that the Drill Sergeant likely uses the same tone of language and respect or disrespect as we experienced when we received when we were traumatized or forced to endure a difficult life passage. In my case, I know this explains why my DS sounds so much like my mother, with her clipped British tones to the never-ending German accent. She was very angry at her own life and would direct that rage at me whenever she decided I had let her down again. Now, I see that I am a textbook case for Michelle’s message and in a way, I’m lucky to have found someone who can help me to internalize a new kind of self understanding in order to move on. In a way, I feel like I’m being untangled, unscrambled, like the funhouse mirror is becoming less wonky and I can now trust my internal perceptions without the doubt that was generated by such a diminishing canary. (more…)
Balancing Focus Check-In by Michelle Morand
Hey out there in the CEDRIC community. How’s your day going so far?
As I write this, it’s beautifully sunny outside and warming up. Yay!!
My dear friend Mark is planning to come and visit from a far away warm and sunny place but he won’t come until it’s warm enough to wear shorts!!! Says he doesn’t even own a pair of long pants! Can you believe it!!?? So, I’m hoping the warm weather comes soon. I’ll let you know when he arrives as that’s a sure indicator that summer is here. Mark is a great spiritual teacher for me and I always learn so much about myself in his presence so no doubt I’ll have lots to share about my own personal process in the next few months.
I just wanted to check in with you ladies and gents and see how your inner feedback balancing was going. Who has taken up the challenge? How are you doing with it? (Don’t have a clue what I’m talking about? Check out this link and start to heal your negative self-talk and all or nothing thinking!)
If you haven’t started the exercise even though you read the article ask yourself “what’s creating the procrastination?”. Is it true that you don’t need to enhance your ability to allow authentic feedback on both sides of the equation (positive and “constructive”)? Is it true you don’t have time today to take 10 minutes to write out things you’re grateful for from your past/present and future? Is it true that you can’t begin to allow yourself the constructive feedback you feel is true while also offering yourself gentle reminders of what is working in your life?
Ask yourself what may be preventing you from taking this next step in your healing of your use of food to cope?
Chances are, it’s an all or nothing story that when brought to light is easily debunked! Don’t let those old bogus stories of how you don’t have time or how it won’t work for you. Don’t listen to the Drill Sergeant who says you need so much more help than this little tool can offer so there’s no point in doing anything. Don’t let these initial hazards stop you from taking the next step on your path to healing.
It’s the all or nothing thinking that keeps you stuck using food to cope. Don’t let that old harmful mindset be the thing that drives the show and prevents you from moving forward. Remember dear old Einstein said “The same mind that created the problem can not be used to solve it!” And don’t leave it up to your old all or nothing mindset to determine whether there is any point in you using a new tool to help you overcome your restriction or your binging or purging.
Let me know how it goes!
Love Michelle