Posts Tagged eating disorders
Thoughts on Natural Eating
Many people hear the term Natural Eating and immediately assume it’s about eating whole grains and non-processed foods or has something to do with organics or locally grown produce, etc. Well, those are all great ideas and your body will love you for eating as unprocessed as possible, but….that’s not what we mean when we say “natural eating.” Natural Eating, also more recently dubbed “Intuitive Eating,” refers to the simple process of eating when you’re hungry and stopping when you’re full. As a natural eater you are conscious of your body’s signals of hunger, fullness, lightness, energy, or bloating, lethargy, fatigue and heaviness. These are your cues about what your body likes and needs vs. what it doesn’t. In a natural eating approach, you honor those cues and are drawn to choose foods that allow you to feel light, full, and energized after eating rather than heavy, bloated, and pooped out. (more…)CEDRIC Client Testimonials
By Tina Budeweit-Weeks, Ed.
We want to share the feedback we get with our readers. Here is a little collection of the nice things people are saying about what the CEDRIC Centre is doing for them. In one of the comments, our process of achieving wellness is refered to as ‘slaying dragons’. Its kind of fun to think of the ‘Drill Sergeant’ as having scales and breathing fire. I think that with the continued influence of CEDRIC philosophy, people can start seeing the fillibustering roaring dragons for what they are, meek, tiny, feeble little energies that are out to get us.
Hah!
The first little write-up is from participants of our Phase II Weekend Workshops.
“Thank you for making this opportunity available. Coming together with other people that use food to cope is not only comforting but motivating. You provided a platform where others like me could learn in parity, by sharing our stories, experiences and challenges. This past weekend has not only given me further insight into myself as a person but has also left me feeling very inspired to be (as I am learning) the individual, wife, mom and friend I want and can be. I look forward to continuing on this journey with you as my guide and support. You are an incredible counselor, teacher and woman. I cannot thank you enough. L.”
This next testimonial is much longer, but says so much that we wanted to share it with you in its entirety. (more…)Values – Part II
Hello and welcome to The CEDRIC Centre blog and on-line community!
Last week I wrote an article on values and encouraged you to write out a list of your own and to contrast your list of values with your current reality. How did you do?
I guarantee you that if you’re struggling with an eating disorder (overeating, restricting or purging) the way you are living your life now does not jive with your core values.
What’s exciting about that statement is that it means that if you get clear on what your ideal/desired values are and you challenge yourself to begin to truly live from them you will immediately feel significantly more peaceful and relaxed in yourself and in your world; your anxiety will diminish greatly and your need for food to cope will cease to exist. Yes, it’s true.
Another way of saying that is that the only reason you struggle with disordered eating in the first place, or anxiety or depression for that matter is because you are going against your core values somewhere in your life. This violation of your true self, your inner conscience, creates a sense of separation and a lack of trust and safety within yourself. The more you act in ways that compromise the values you believe in, the more anxious and alienated you feel and the more insecure you are overall. Another way of saying that is that when you go against your core values you are out of integrity. And when you’re out of integrity you feel guilty, bad, wrong, ashamed, embarrassed, and just plain anxious. (Are any of those familiar to you?)
When we act from a place of integrity, honoring our core values, it doesn’t matter if someone is mad at us, threatening us, blaming us for their sadness or their life, we have empathy for them without taking it on. We know that our responsibility first and foremost is to honor our core values because if we do that, we truly are doing our best for that person; for our friends and family and our society. It’s true.
Think about it, does anyone truly gain when you lie for them? Does anyone truly benefit from you compromising your commitments to yourself or others for them? No. Maybe in the short term it might seem like it. But really, very quickly, the relationship begins to suffer from the lack of respect and integrity; resentment and insecurity build and what could have been a very lovely friendship or partnership turns sour. And when you step in to try and “fix” things for someone else by taking responsibility for their actions or needs you’re sending that person a message of disrespect. In essence you are saying “I don’t think you’re capable of handling this on your own so I’m going to do it for you.” It’s hard to build a healthy connection that way. It establishes a sense of dependency and imbalance that is hard to overcome.
In the immediate moment it might seem like a good idea to compromise yourself to make someone happy or to meet their needs in some way. It isn’t. “But what could it hurt, just this little bit, just this once, if it makes them happy?” you say? Lots. You will end up paying the price tenfold as will the relationship. You’ll feel anxious and insecure. You’ll feel compromised and taken advantage of. You’ll set a precedent for the next time this person has this problem or need and it is harder then, to set a different boundary. You’ll feel bad. And I suspect that you’ll use food to cope. That’s a big price for not saying no to a dinner invitation or to giving someone a ride etc. But that’s the price you pay each time you go against your core values and needs to “make” someone else happy or to avoid their anger or disappointment in you.
So, take the time to make that ‘Values List’ if you haven’t yet and then look at the primary relationships in your life and see if any of them, as they are currently operating, require you to compromise yourself in any way. Make a list of the little and big things that you do that don’t feel right to you or of the dynamics between you and the other person that leave you feeling controlled and disrespected or frustrated.
There is a good chance that those things are happening because you’re allowing your core values to be compromised and chances are those things couldn’t even begin to happen if you honored your core values.
Check it out and let me know what you discover.
Love Michelle
If you like this article and want to stay connected make sure you register for our free on-line newsletter so you can receive weekly updates and articles that will support you to be the best that you can be in all ways!From Co-dependence to Confidence
February is relationship month here at CEDRIC and our newsletters this month will centre around the issue of relating to others. One of the key aspects that influences all our interactions with others, whether they are lovers, friends, family, co-workers or the check-out girl at the grocery story, is the degree of unconscious co-dependent behaviour that exists in us.
Ask yourself this question: Is there anything in my life right now that I feel anxious about that is not related to me feeling responsible in some way for someone else’s feelings and/or needs? No?
Or try it this way: If I could miraculously let go of feeling responsible for what other people feel and need or expect of me, how would I feel? Like I had just lost a hundred pounds? Free? Like I could finally live my life?
And what about this one: Is there any anxiety in me that isn’t about me wanting control of someone’s perception of me because I believe that if they approve of me I’ll finally be able to relax and won’t feel as anxious all the time? (more…)Phase I Weekend Workshop Feedback; February 20 – 22nd, 2009
Hello All!
“I really appreciate hearing from others in a group setting. I got far more than I expected out of the workshop. I do not feel like there is anything missing. I have been given all the pieces to be effective and make lasting changes. Everyone was given what they needed and got lots of one on one time. I honestly couldn’t suggest one single thing that would have made the weekend here more complete and satisfying. I thank you from my heart that I had this opportunity.” (more…)CEDRIC News – Michelle on your local TV -February 2, 2009
Michelle’s Morand’s A-Channel Adventure by Tina Budeweit-Weeks, CEDRIC Correspondent
As the first week in February is recognized as National Eating Disorders Week, in order
to draw more attention to the concerns related to it, CEDRIC’s Michelle Morand was interviewed first thing Monday morning on the A Channel’s breakfast show. She was a vision of serenity in a simple black outfit offset by a long woven scarf in warm autumn colours draped casually across one shoulder.
Newscaster Erick Thompson asked some great questions around society’s increased need for CEDRIC’s approach and Michelle’s calm answers were clear, concise and gently worded, providing the viewing audience with an example of the gentle way issues around eating disorders are handled at CEDRIC. (more…)Tina Budeweit-Weeks, CEDRIC correspondent here:
Weekly, I take a couple of hours that I set aside specially, to peruse the internet to find sites that support the process of CEDRIC participants. I figure if its interesting to me, as I too, consider myself a 100% participant, it likely will resonate with some of our readers as well.
This week, I found a fabulous site that links databases around women’s alternative health. Especially interesting is the entire listing I found for guided imagery, or what I am accustomed to referring to as ‘guided meditations’, a wonderful tool for overcoming strife and tension. (That doesn’t involve food or exercise!) ‘Women’s Mind/Body Health’ is the link to resource this with another link on that page leading to where to access the books and tapes that one can benefit from by listening and reading more about it. (more…)Tandem Healing by Tina Budeweit
There is something profoundly significant in the support of friendships. When we have someone or a few trustworthy and beloved someones who know us, have history with us, and have a wish to help us, we are miles ahead of those who don’t.
I was thinking, on my journey to wellness, how much easier it would be to get more motivated to get out if I have a friend who would be willing to go for walks out in the green spaces of the region with me. Then, as I was sitting on my balcony with my first coffee, in the early morning fogginess, pondering the vista of Esquimalt harbour in front of me, that led me to thinking … what about ‘tandem healing’?
Not just the healing of friendships or having a friend badger you to get off your duff and get out with them so you get more physically active, but how about having a friend who also has ‘issues’ that they want to have re-aligned, go into the CEDRIC community and process the literature and workshops together? Of course, it would require the patience needed of the other to give them the time and space to do the work that is individual to each of the friend’s healing process, but doesn’t it make sense that if friendship and camaraderie in a trusted environment is healing, then taking an intentional path together toward wellness would not only expedite the individual healing process through the support available, but wouldn’t that tandem healing also deepen the friendship?
Two eagles fly by me as I write this and I see it as an omen. (more…)CEDRIC Client Q and A
Hi Michelle,
I have been struggling with my back for about 2 years now, even though I have been exercising lots. There could be a few reasons for this, one of them being my weight. I have lost about 20 lbs this year, but am still over 200 lbs and still at the heavier end of my normal weight. I would like to lose some more weight (hopefully at a quicker rate than 20lbs over 9 months) to alleviate the pain in my back but I am scared to get sucked into a diet mentality. Do you have any suggestions?
Thanks,
N
Hi N.
This is a great question and it’s very exciting that you’re asking it because it implies so much about how far along you are in your healing. Any of us who have gained weight as a result of our use of food to cope need to ask this question at some point in our recovery. We naturally want to lose weight and we know that some change to our intake of food needs to happen in order for that weight loss to occur. We also know that it was dieting and restriction around food that led to things getting so out of hand in the first place, so we’re understandably petrified, stuck, procrastinating on doing anything. The key is to be clear in yourself that you’re wanting to make these changes to your food intake (quantity and quality) because you care about yourself from a health and overall wellness perspective first and an appearance perspective second. (more…)