Beginning the new year with mindful-ness and veggies :)
Posted by Cedric on January 17, 2009 As I type, I breathe in the sweet aroma of the hyacinth blooming wickedly early in its pot on the edge of my desk. I put it there to remind me that winter is not capable of eternally putting its grip on me, that there is a light at the end of all this bundling up and hiding in our clothes to stay warm and soon, we too will have an opportunity to blossom and affect those around us with our own influence, just as the purple perfume of the hyacinth teases me now. Mindfulness is not something that the hyacinth has to concern itself about but it is indeed necessary if we are to do the important work of evolving. Flowers merely have to exist and that is enough, and there is something Zenlike to be learned from that, but we humans are here for more complicated tasks and as we function on many levels in an automatic fashion, we must consider our fate, our future and the implications of our actions upon our lives and that of others. When I am dealing with issues around my infernal weight gain, I wish I could be happy as a plump hyacinth in the field that cares not whether it is trim or not, but alas, being human, I have to own up to it and take responsibility for my actions. I HAVEN’T been fair to myself, I HAVEN’T been good to my physical body, I HAVE neglected to be mindful when it comes to my personal health. It has been at my expense that I have spent the past 22 years taking care of others and that is thankfully changing. In my effort to evolve as a person taking up the space I was intended to, rather than my and two other people’s share, I have spent the past week being mindful of many things I usually let flow by the wayside. Premier in my attentiveness has been watching the labels of what I purchase to use as food for my home. I can see immediate responses as my body already reflects the lack of HFCS I used to flood my poor liver with. Not only do I sleep more soundly, I am noticing that I am much less stiff when moving from a sedentary position, that my back doesn’t ache when I walk like it used to, and that I am limber enough to put on my own socks!!! It’s a bloomin’ miracle! Being mindful to me also means setting ones intentions to live with integrity, to attend to needs in sustainable ways, to care for others but not at the expense of myself. So here we are, facing the end of the second week of 2009. How have you altered your course to live more intentionally? Is your competence approaching unconsciousness yet? Mine hasn’t but I feel like I’m well on my way. As January streaks by, I take time to ponder what I expect of the year. Last year I accomplished much in the way of moving mountains, but this year is going to be even more magical, methinks. In the meantime, I am taking time to get my trajectory on a path that will lead me to being happier inside and out. My last blog article mentioned Time Management, and I wanted to talk about that a wee bit today as I found that the zen of preparing my veggies for the week is going to be a crucial step towards my finding that balance. As I acquired my groceries for the week, in the outside aisles of the supermarket were where I shopped, I took home a plethora of veggies and instead of mindlessly tossing them into the veggie cooler in the fridge, I laid them out to wash. The organic peppers, carrots, broccoli and cauliflower were a colourful delight on my cutting board and I found myself daydreaming about the future as I took care to prepare all the veggies I brought home, in one fell swoop.Tina Budeweit-Weeks is a member of the CEDRIC Success Team in the role of staff writer and executive assistant for Michelle Morand. Her philosophy has always been one of self-nurturance and dignity. In support of the complex difficulties clients may experience around regaining a healthy balance, Tina’s writing is designed to sympathize, support, encourage and inform. Although there are many similarities in Tina’s process, she is not a client, but a hard working, behind-the-scenes member of the team, dedicated to helping the CEDRIC Centre stay current and effective.
Tina’s Journey – Conscious Competence : Using Winter Wisely – Learning to live with intention
Posted by Cedric on January 13, 2009
Tina’s Journey – ‘Skiing’ all year
Posted by Cedric on January 13, 2009 Reading the CEDRIC Core Beliefs Handbook, it’s no surprise to me that by looking to the source of my inner diminishment, my childhood, I am able to put the finger right on the basis of CEDRIC teachings. Core Beliefs are really the foundation for any psyche and as I learn to reshuffle my personal priorities and internalized understandings, the difficult issues of low self-esteem and lowered self worth in my past are deeply ingrained and something I must focus on overcoming everyday. Here’s how I’m working through this: Putting oneself first is no mean feat when I’ve spend the last twenty plus years putting the needs of my children ahead of myself as they grew up, as it should be. The danger here, though, is that there is a tendency to hide behind distractions such as letting the priorities of others become a deterrent to our dealing with our own needs. Eating right and regularly contribute to maintaining a holistic lifestyle, but when one is unable to ascertain what one needs because historically the needs of others have overridden our personal needs, unhealthy habits become the norm. Habits like snacking, caving to temptations, and unintentional imbibing that is a knee jerk response to frustration all contribute to harming one’s body and one’s body image and as a result, one’s self esteem faces a downward spiral. Finding the balance has always been the trick for this Libran, who’s scales are always teetering and rarely level. Striving for harmony and harmonious surroundings is much easier now that my life has changed so much. Not a parent any longer, nor am I a student. My newfound identity as an independent woman finds me in a loved relationship, both within, with myself, and without, with my hubby, which distracts me much less now.Tina’s Journey – ‘Skiing’ all year
The Core Beliefs handbook suggests one should look to where in their childhood they first felt blindsided and their delicate self esteem began taking abuse. Its easy for me to pinpoint this. As a child, I grew up in a home where my mother was oblivious of the impact of her callousness on her two daughters. It wasn’t until after years of counselling and self work that I have learned to not assign blame in my mother’s direction however. She was and always will be a victim of World War II, having grown up in Germany during the war years as the oldest girl in a large family that was headed by an authoritarian father who had no business parenting, and who had no idea how his corporal attitudes would reflect on his grandchildren when his children became adults and had kids of their own. My mother dismissed counselling, denying it of any value, believing it was for ‘crazy people’. As a result, the Russian soldiers who caused her family so much grief are still winning – still there in her mind with their long-ago abuses reflected through all her daily actions. When Anthony Robbins, the famous motivational guru, talks about people’s emotional winters, I think of my mother, who exemplifies the role of eternal victim. Unlike her, I am a survivor, excelling in spite of my life and history, not because of it. Tony Robbins says that when people face their emotional winters, face their core challenges, some people go skiing, some choose to freeze to death. Mom chose the latter, but in my best interests, I’ve not only learned to ‘ski’, but I’ve raised my children into adulthood with the skills needed to face their hardships in the affirmative – to take the lessons presented by the current challenges and ski with them. My mother, as a result, was very hard on my headstrong and precocious self. Her constant diminishment, her tendency to hit and scream without warning, caused me to have extremely low self esteem until well into my 30’s, when I began in earnest, to rectify this, through counselling. The hard work has paid off, as I now have a fairly solid self image that I and noone else has defined. In spite of this, though, it’s ironic that the ingrained, ancient self perceptions planted by my mother have caused my ‘Drill Sergeant’ to have my mother’s soft, clipped voice with its germanic/British accent. I can say, encouragingly, that as one becomes more skilled in handling challenges, in staying in the love, in staying positive, that Drill Sergeant’s voice becomes much more sporadic and definitely less vehement. Now, when I hear that internal critic speaking to me in a voice that my close friends would NEVER use towards me, I take it as a sign that I am tired, overworked, out of energy, hungry or just needing to change my focus from one of outwardly dealing with the needs of others, and instead, begin considering what my own needs are. One priceless counselling experience really helped me address the tendency of my Drill Sergeant’s callous opinion of myself to blindside my confidence which often contributed to causing me to second-guess myself. This innovative counselor listened to me as I outlined some of my history and after thinking a bit, she replied, “When you hear that internal dialogue of self-diminishment, instead of giving it undue energy, just acknowledge it… just try responding minimally by saying to yourself ‘There it is.’ and then return to whatever you were doing.” That suggestion has proven to be pure gold. The old me was prone to stop in my tracks and take on the Drill Sergeant’s barrage of self-critical input, disrupting my confidence. By applying the simple words ‘There it is’, and consciously choosing to not let it get to me, I circumvented a very old knee-jerk response, and ultimately, it changed my life. It wasn’t easy at first – old habits die hard and the Drill Sergeant doesn’t give up without a concerted battle. I perservered with repeated applications of the ‘There it is’ exercise, and like new muscle using repetition, I was able to mute self-deprecating internal dialogue much more easily. By identifying where my personal perspective of core esteem began, I can lay those blue meanies to rest, redeem myself for the valid and capable person I have become, and move ahead. Maybe that’s the lesson to glean from this whole challenge. The red flag that flies up when I hear the Drill Sergeant now, tells me not to listen to the words of the DS but to the existence of my personal state changing to one of more accumulated stress than I can bear, and to start to focus on myself immediately. I hope my insights around core beliefs have a positive effect on your process. As we journey together towards wholeness, we need to know that those who try to diminish us exist (that’s self preservation). We should pay attention to how they operate and where they come from, but we don’t need to give them energy, and that goes for the ‘Drill Sergeant’ as well.Newsletter Archive
Posted by Cedric on January 13, 2009Newsletter Archive – Food is Not the Problem
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Leave a Comment (1) →Tina’s Journey – Caving to the Craving: Complications afoot
Posted by Cedric on January 8, 2009
Tina Budeweit-Weeks is a member of the CEDRIC Success Team in the role of staff writer and executive assistant for Michelle Morand. Her philosophy has always been one of self-nurturance and dignity. In support of the complex difficulties clients may experience around regaining a healthy balance, Tina’s writing is designed to sympathize, support, encourage and inform. Although there are many similarities in Tina’s process, she is not a client, but a hard working, behind-the-scenes member of the team, dedicated to helping the CEDRIC Centre stay current and effective.
All Products Bundle (download)
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Leave a Comment (0) →The Art of Healthy Relationships
Posted by Cedric on December 31, 2008 True interdependence is the ability to be fully yourself in a relationship with someone else and allow them to do the same. Interdependence is the art of allowing someone to be there to support you without feeling “needy” or somehow “obligated” to them. In healthy relationships we are able to ask directly for what we need and our requests are respected and validated by ourselves and by others even if they can’t be met at that time or by that person: it’s safe to ask and it’s okay to hear the word “no”. (more…)Posted in: Video
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