Posts Tagged self confidence
Posted by mmorand on July 28, 2012
A Snapshot of Your Daily Life (And What to do to Make it Better)
We’ve all been there! You wake up feeling that same old anxiety begin to wash over you. Then you become conscious of your thoughts and they’re a churning blend of everything you need to do that day, all that you didn’t do (or didn’t do right) yesterday, and of food and of your body.
Even if you had a ‘good’ day yesterday and ate what you were ‘supposed’ to, that voice in your head is telling you: “You’re still not there yet! You’d better not screw up today!” And even if you somehow managed to get ‘there’ and you’re the weight and body size you’ve always told yourself you’re supposed to be, because you got there through restriction and behaviours that are neither life-enhancing nor sustainable, that voice in the back of your head is saying “It won’t last!”
And you haven’t even made it out of bed yet.
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Tags: bad body thoughts, body image, bulimia, Chronic dieting, eating disorder treatment, insecurity, overeating, overweight, rebalancing, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self-conscious; eating disorder help, underweight
Posted in: 2012, All-or-Nothing Thinking, Relationship with Food, Relationship with Self
Posted by mmorand on April 21, 2012
Hello!
This is Part IX in our Diet Mentality series. Can you believe it!!? We’ve almost covered all the key points of the diet mentality and now you’ve got some clear and specific suggestions of what to do to change and let go completely of each of them.
In case you’re new to our community you should know that my mission statement as an author/educator and counsellor is to ensure that anyone who wants to change their stressful relationship with food, regardless of where they live or their financial situation, gets the tools they need to step free! So this series is just another in a long line of articles, stemming back over 10 years, that I have written every week to provide you with tools and information to change your relationship with food.
The CEDRIC Centre and our counselling and support team offer personalized healing retreats, individual counselling and group support, workshops, an interactive web based program and books, workbooks and many other resources like cd’s and video clips to help you step free completely from any stress around food and body image.
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Posted by mmorand on January 20, 2012
Those of us who use food to cope, or drugs, alcohol, shopping, procrastination, isolation, busywork, and even more socially-sanctioned strategies like over-exercise, co-dependency and workaholism, use those strategies in an attempt to distance ourselves from the constant sense of anxiety we feel within.
The learned helplessness stories sound something like this:
- I can’t
- It’s too big
- It’s too much
- I’m not capable
- I won’t be able to do it
- I’m not allowed
And, those learned helplessness, all-or-nothing stories (that trigger our anxiety and our use of harmful coping strategies) are triggered by a naturally and appropriately occurring sensation in our bodies that I call “the niggle.”
The niggle arises when we have needs that aren’t being met.
If you used food to cope as a child (or any other of the strategies listed above), it is extremely likely that when you felt that little niggle inside that let you know you needed something and you tried to get that need met through your words or actions, you were unsuccessful, or perhaps even berated or shamed or physically harmed.
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Tags: acceptance, all-or-nothing thinking, anxiety, critisism, drill sergeant, eating disorder treatment, eating disorders, forgiveness, healing, insecurity, learned helplessness, making mistakes, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self worth, self-judgement, shame, triggers, unmet needs
Posted in: 2012, All-or-Nothing Thinking, Relationship with Self
Posted by mmorand on August 27, 2011
I am a specialist who works with those who are frustrated with their bodies and their relationship with food (those who binge or restrict or purge in any way). As you can imagine, in my conversations with clients, the topic of feeling envious of the seeming ease and comfort that others feel in their bodies and with food and then consequently feeling guilty/shameful for feeling envious, comes up daily.
As such, I have, from my own recovery process and countless hours with clients, devised a quick little tool to shift those icky, jealous feelings and the underlying needs that triggered them.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying you’ll never, ever again start to feel those stirrings of “Why them and not me!?” around those people/places/things that we would like for ourselves or conversely, “Why me and not them!!!?” around those things that we’d really have preferred not to have experienced in our brief but action-packed lives.
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Tags: binge eating, binging, body image, bulimia, compulsive eating, eating disorder clinics, eating disorder treatment, eating disorders, natural eating, nurturing, overeating, purging, recovery, restricting, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self worth, triggers
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre
Posted by mmorand on June 4, 2011
Hello, and welcome to another instalment of our Natural Eating Q&A series.
This week we’re exploring the following question:
“How can I trust my body to know what it needs when, in the past, I always ended up binging? Clearly, I can’t trust myself to just let myself have whatever I want, right?”
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Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, anxiety, binge eating, body/mind/spirit, bulimia, compulsive eating, core beliefs, drill sergeant, eating disorders, exploring, forgiveness, healing, natural eating, overeating, past, recovery, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self worth
Posted in: Natural Eating 101
Posted by mmorand on May 28, 2011
We are continuing our Natural Eating Q&A session with a question that comes up with each and every client I’ve ever supported through this process. It goes something like this:
“What if I try to check in but the voice in my head just says: “Who cares about checking in?! I just want food now!!!”
Well, this is a pretty simple one.
If you’re hearing that dialogue in your head when you realize you’re wanting to use food to cope, it absolutely, no exceptions, means that you’re feeling overwhelmed and you are afraid that if you don’t use food to cope in that moment, you’ll get consumed by the thoughts and feelings you’re trying to keep at bay through the act of eating (and then maybe purging or beating yourself up).
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Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, anorexia, anxiety, binge eating, body image, bulimia, CEDRIC Centre, compulsive eating, core beliefs, drill sergeant, eating disorder clinics, eating disorder treatment, eating disorders, exploring, forgiveness, healing, list of stressors, nurturing, overeating, rebalancing, recovery, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self worth, triggers
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, Natural Eating 101
Posted by mmorand on May 7, 2011
For the next few weeks, I am going to make my articles specific to those of you who are actively working through Natural Eating or wanting to begin exploring how to go from that annoying old Diet Mentality to the peace, ease, and flow of Natural Eating.
To do that, I’m going to spend the next few weeks answering some questions that I often hear clients asking regarding natural eating.
I’ve listed some of the questions I’ll be answering in the weeks to come below. If you have a question on Natural Eating that is not on that list, send it my way and I promise I will answer it at some point in this series.
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Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, anorexia, anxiety, binge eating, binging, bulimia, compulsive eating, eating disorders, natural eating, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self worth, triggers
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, Natural Eating 101
Posted by mmorand on April 23, 2011
It’s funny how much correspondence I will get about a general discussion topic but how little I will get from an email article that has anything whatsoever to do with topics like goal setting or learned helplessness. You know what I mean. It’s great to read and get ideas and to feel like someone else knows where you’re at and that there is hope for you to heal and be completely free of food and body image stress; the coping strategies of emotional eating, restriction (anorexia), or binging (binge eating disorder), or purging (bulimia) and the underlying co-dependent training and all-or-nothing thinking that trigger you to feel the need to do those things. That’s what we all want: a life that is free from self-harm and self-loathing and chronic anxiety and insecurity. And that’s what you can get from The CEDRIC Method and from working through these articles.
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Tags: acceptance, all-or-nothing thinking, anorexia, anxiety, binge eating, body image, body/mind/spirit, bulimia, compulsive eating, core beliefs, drill sergeant, eating disorder treatment, eating disorders, exploring, forgiveness, growing, healing, learned helplessness, natural eating, nurturing, overeating, past, present, purging, rebalancing, self care, self confidence, self esteem, self love, self worth
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, Natural Eating 101
Posted by mmorand on February 26, 2011
This article is part of a series: Relationships 101: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4.
This week in our Relationships 101 series, I want to chat a bit about flags in a relationship.
If I do say so myself, I wrote a pretty smokin’ section on this in my book so if you’ve got access to “Food is not the Problem: Deal With What Is!“ I encourage you to check out Chapter 23. It’s got lots of good education and tools on communication in relationships.
I’m going to present an abridged and updated version of the section on flags here so you can get a good feel for the concept and begin to experiment with it yourself.
The Flag System
I am about to share with you a concept that is not in and of itself a communication tool. However, it is a fundamental tool for assessing the information you are receiving verbally and non-verbally from people in your life. Once you have assessed this information, you will be in a stronger and clearer place to determine for yourself how you want and need to proceed. By that, I mean whether or not you need to speak to the other person, and if so, what you need to say. (We’ll address the what to say and how to say it in the next 2 weeks of this series of articles).
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Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, binge eating, co-dependence, co-dependency, co-dependent, compulsive eating, eating disorders, overeating, purging, relationships, self confidence
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, newsletter, Relationship with Food, Relationship with Others, Relationship with Self, Relationships 101
Posted by mmorand on February 19, 2011
This article is part of a series: Relationships 101: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4.
Okay folks, we’re at Week 3 of what could (but won’t) be a 52-week series! We’re going to tackle the key bits of any relationship and how to make yours hum in 6 weeks (or so). This week we’re specifically going to explore flags in a relationship.
If you’re not into this series as it’s just not where you’re at or what you’re needing at this time, I highly recommend you spend the next few weeks reviewing the “Complete Recovery Series.” This is a series I wrote that lays out the key tools you need to begin to experience healing in your relationship with food. You’ll find a listing of all the articles on the left hand side of the blog.
If you’re following along with this series however, you’ll have experimented a bit last week with providing for others and for yourself that which you have been expecting or looking for from them. I’ll bet you learned a great deal and that already you have greater empathy for yourself and for others.
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Tags: all-or-nothing thinking, binge eating, co-dependence, co-dependency, co-dependent, compulsive eating, eating disorders, overeating, purging, relationships, self confidence
Posted in: CEDRIC Centre, newsletter, Relationship with Food, Relationship with Others, Relationship with Self, Relationships 101
