Healthy Relationships (download)
The patterns that we have learned about how to be in relationship with another person are often a key element in our use of food to cope. Those old harmful ways of thinking about relationships and our role in them frequently thwarts our recovery more than anything else. This doesn’t speak to your significant other necessarily, it may be colleagues, parents, kids, friends, the grocery store clerk etc. It doesn’t matter who it is. If you’re in the habit of looking outside of yourself for validation and approval of who you are and what you’re worth you will to some extent be stuck in the insecurity of “the external locus of control.” This is a very vulnerable place to be and it’s practically impossible not to use some behavioural coping strategy like food, alcohol, shopping, co-dependency etc. when you’re there. It’s impossible to feel safe and secure in your world when it is (or at least seems to be) ruled by everyone else; their moods; their whims and needs at the moment.