• You are no more responsible for the needs, feelings and behaviors of others than you are for the weather. #
• Are you or a loved one challenged by using food to cope? Victoria workshop Jan 29-31. http://bit.ly/1A2awC #
• Come to Victoria for Phase 1 Workshop Jan 29-31. http://bit.ly/1A2awC #
• If you are struggling with bulimia and anorexia, there is a way out. And it won’t take years. #
• We all have ways we cope with life, but if you’re using food as a coping strategy, I can bet it’s not serving you well. #
• Get a live workshop experience with me Dec 4-6 in Victoria. http://bit.ly/1A2awC #
• I know what your Drill Sgt. (inner critic) likes to tell you, but you don’t have to be his victim. #
• Learn why you use food to cope and get a plan for the New Year. Workshop Dec 4-6. http://bit.ly/1A2awC #
• Why struggle with food issues any longer? Information and support are here for you. #
• Last Phase 1 workshop this year in Victoria Dec 4-6. http://bit.ly/1A2awC #

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I can’t believe that I didn’t see it as I was writing it but it is kind of ironic that last week, as I was sharing the news of my engagement with you all, the topic I chose to write on was “commitments and balance”! Ah, the subconscious works in mysterious ways doesn’t it!? We teach what we most need to learn!

It’s definitely a message that I can stand to be reminded of:

“Don’t make commitments you can’t keep and still live a balanced life!”

No, I’m not rethinking my plans to marry. I am, however, conscious of the need to stay grounded in my day-to-day self-care routine in order to be the best that I can be for my son, my sweetheart, my family and friends-at-large and my clients. We all share that need. We all need a fundamental routine of self-care that we honor first and foremost in order to have the energy and the presence of mind to be healthy and balanced and patient and clear-headed with the rest of the world as we go through our day.

Continue reading “Commitments and Balance Part II” »

It is very freeing to step out of your all-or-nothing thinking and old core belief, and to allow for the possibility that what you have believed about yourself or about old situations isn’t true. Stepping out of this old belief leaves a vacancy, a space that needs to be filled with a new thought or belief.  If spiritual enlightenment is your ultimate goal, at some point you will find yourself in a place where you don’t need to replace this old belief with anything: you just exist peacefully in the space that is left when it departs. For the rest of you who either don’t necessarily desire that or who are still on the path to enlightenment, there is the desired belief.

The desired belief is the new story, the new thought which you will offer yourself whenever you notice the triggering of that old belief. Your desired belief will ultimately become your automatic thought: your “default setting” as I call it. For now, it will require some consciousness on your part to reinforce the new belief, but it isn’t hard to do.

First let’s figure out what your desired belief is. The best and simplest way to do this is to take a look at your current belief. Let’s use I am not good enough as our example.

Continue reading “Your Desired Belief” »

This is a follow up to our 6-part series on self-care. If you haven’t read the others, here are the links:
The First Step to Self-Care
Self-Care Part 2
Self-Care Part 3: Sustainable Change Begins
Self-Care Part 4: Getting from Here to There
Self-Care Part 5: Letting Go of Your Stories
Self-Care Part 6: Realistic Goals

This question came in earlier this week from Nadine and I thought that there might be one or two others of you who may benefit from exploring this tool.
Continue reading “The First Step to Self-Care Revisited” »

Commitments and Balance

“Don’t make commitments you can’t keep….and still live a balanced life.” mm

Perhaps you’re wondering why I added that little bit on the end there? Well, since you asked…

Most people will agree that the definition of Integrity is somewhere along the lines of “doing what you say you will” or “words and actions in alignment.” I concur with these definitions. But there is a very important piece of the puzzle missing, or inferred:

Integrity = Do what you say you will as long as it doesn’t harm you.

In order to be living from this definition of integrity you have to

1. Be well aware of what you’re feeling and needing and
2. Be well aware of your deservedness to take care of yourself first and foremost.

No, that is not selfish, it is self-loving. It is necessary as a fundamental framework in your life to honor your commitments to yourself first and foremost.

Continue reading “Commitments and Balance” »